Maybe it's the weather. Or maybe I've mysteriously lapsed back into the seventh grade. Or it could be that haze that I usually can outrun has caught up with me as it does from time to time.
Whatever it is, I'm feeling so inexplicably sad and lonely right now. With no good reason to, mind you. But it's the kind of thing when you keep checking e-mail, or looking at your phone, just in case there might be a message. Any message, but particularly one from someone you haven't heard from in a long time, or who just had to call to say how great you were. And each time, you look away, disappointed.
It's a lot like those junior high years, where a message scrawled by your mom on a notepad that so and so called - or worse, no note at all - could make or break your day.
The vast number of communications methods that can you mock you with their silence is worse now though, and if it's this way for a grown woman, I can only imagine being 13 again. Rejection for me was limited to staring relentlessly at the French phone in my room, willing it to ring. Now, kids can be snubbed on Facebook, on Twitter, by e-mail, by text message. And worse, there's no hoping that maybe they were just too busy to call. All those status updates proclaim otherwise.
As for me, I'll push through the haze, probably much in the same way I did back in seventh grade: sometimes sloppily, sometimes gracefully, and mostly stubbornly, all while listening to too much 1980's music. And eventually, I'll make that French phone ring.
2 comments:
You need some words of wisdom to cheer you up.
Homer: I've learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.
I miss you and love you. Can we puh-lease make a date??
Post a Comment