Is nothing sacred?

Seriously, now, it's bad enough that women have to try to live up to the images of models all over TV and magazines normally (which, by the way, have you seen those new Old Navy jeans adds for their three new cuts? The ones that I swear are spray painted on? Didn't The Gap learn this lesson with the whole "skinny pants" debacle of last year?).

Anyway, I digress...

As I sit here, one day past my due date, and feeling huge, puffy and otherwise unattractive, I naturally turn to that household crack known as daytime TV. Which is fine, especially when I come across Discovery Health's birth shows. OK, I think, some training and preparation for the kid's big arrival. Great.

But then what comes on next? A show called "Runway Moms." I look up from my frantic-thank-you-note-writing/e-mail-announcement-address-gathering/last-minute-list-making activities to check it out, thinking I'm about to learn about what all those wacky supermodels do (typo note here: I just wrote "due" instead of "do" - can't imagine what I've been thinking about... :)) when they switch from strutting runways to changing diapers. Should be amusing.

Um, no. It's a show about maternity models. As in, normally beautiful, skinny women who also happen to be beautiful, skinny pregnant women. As in, lots and lots of images of those lean, glowing, radiant women with the perfect little beach ball that you're sure you're going to look like when you're pregnant someday. That, when you're huge and bloated and feeling like the Michelin Man that you later convince yourself CANNOT TRULY EXIST IN NATURE. Sure, occasionally you spot one or two who come close to looking like that in the store, shopping in the "extra small" section of the maternity area, to whom any pregnant woman can tell you she silently sends mental daggars at as she sifts through the sea of mumu's that she's looking in (they don't come in XS, by the way). But really, those models are all doctored on the page, right?

No, they're not. Here's TV evidence of that fact.

Like I really need this right now.

P.S. And, oh, yeah, the model being featured succeeded in a total natural childbirth. For the love of everything holy...